Cotguy's WoW

[Magnifico jr.]

I'm just going to say it.


This is definitely my favorite federation

[cotguy130]

Sept 10, 2018 0:21:42 GMT -5 Magnifico jr. said:

I'm just going to say it.


This is definitely my favorite federation

Wow!!  (Pun intended)

I will do my darndest to keep you guys entertained for as long as I can.  

Thank you!! 

[cotguy130]

Superstar Saturday 10/4/80
Canada Centre
Great Crowd
1208/38/**

The announcers give a brief news item. The video that played last week at the end of the show had been sent to the production truck via e-mail from Mr. Fantasy’s private account. The subject line was “Play This After the Main”.   Fantasy knew nothing about it. 

1. WoW returns North of the Border to the Canada Centre. The ladies open up with a match featuring newcomer Mynx, and, in her second appearance, Chaka Crass. The Schmuck comes out during the introductions and challenges the winner. At the end of the match, Mynx accepts the challenge.

2. The Neon Express and The Executers continue their sporadic rivalry with a 4-star match that’s marred by a DDQ ending. All 4 men start brawling, and the ref throws out the match. Mr. Fantasy comes out and announces that these 2 teams will meet in a pole match, with a Tag Title match contract in a case on top of the pole.

3. Next up is a partial rematch from two weeks ago. We get another 3-way to find a #1 contender to the TV title. This time, O’ Hooligan has pulled himself out to go after Ninja Star, so Vladimir the Cruel has taken his place against The Great Ginzu and the man who wins the match, Skullgore. Gothica goes to address the crowd after the match, but Skullgore takes the mic from her hand rather brusquely. He says that at Halloween is his favorite night of the year, there’s no way that Average Guy can handle Skullgore when the essences of the dead fill the air on Halloween Night. He and Shop of Horrors will own the night, and it will be the beginning of a long Halloween for WoW.
4. Wall Street over Supernova in non-title match.

5. Pat Cabbage over Cletus Mullet

6. Ninja Star, with Mr. Bonsai, over O’ Hooligan, with The Thinker, in a non-title match. Ninja says that shows that O’ Hooligan is not in his league, or his friend Haka Tonga’s league. O’ Hooligan said that sometimes you lose a battle to win a war. I won the war with Haka Tonga, and I will win this war with you.

7. Chameleon Kid, with Princess Starbright, defeated Pelvis Presley with Big Boss. Jr. Reptile Ranger had been banned from the building.
8. El Presidente and The Piranha fought to a DDQ. Troglo came out before the match with Piranha, but in an uncharacteristic move, Piranha sent him to the back saying that he had to do this himself. Much like the earlier DDQ, the ref called the match off when both men started fighting on the floor and he was unable to restore order. After the bell, El Presidente came up behind Piranha and waffled him with the ring bell. He worked on Piranha’s mask and managed to get it off. Piranha covered up so that no one could see his face as EP tried to pry his arms away. Troglo hit EP from behind and threw him out of the way. He then covered Piranha’s face with a towel and helped him to the back. EP held up Piranha’s mask and demanded that the audience be allowed to see his face. The audience chanted “we don’t want to”

9. Mr. Fantasy came out after Average Guy had been announced for the TV Title match. Skullgore wants to hold his challenge off till Halloween Hellraiser, so he needed to find somebody for tonight. Guy said he was ready for whoever you’ve got. Fantasy welcomed back, for one night only, unless he wins the belt…Dr. B! Guy told The Doctor, Don’t unpack your bag, Doc. This will definitely be for one night only
He was right. Average Guy successfully defended the WoW TV Title against Dr. B. Guy and The Doctor shook hands after the match.

[cotguy130]

Sunday Night Slam 10/12/80
The Ballroom
Sold Out
945/36/**

1. We open SNS from the Ballroom with a solid match featuring Rad Racer picking up a win over Officer Chip.

2. In our second match, GoblinKnight defeats Dungeon Crawler.

3. Shop of Horrors, with Gothica, continues their run with a big win over the B-Boyz. Gothica says that Keith Blood has come back deadlier than ever, and Wall Street, Howl n’ Roar, or whoever’s holding the belts when the time comes, better watch out.

4. The Schmuck defeats Sgt. Shipley. He reminds everyone that Mynx accepted his challenge, so she will be the next example of how women don’t belong in a wrestling ring.

5. Juan Tijuana defeated El Presidente with some help from Piranha. As EP seemed to be taking control of the match, Piranha came to ringside wearing a pillowcase with eyes, nose, and mouth cut out. EP turned all his attention to Piranha and demanded he remove the “sheet”. He said that he had taken Piranha’s mask of legally and he earned the right to expose his identity. As this was going on, Tijuana left the ring and claimed the mask from where it was laying in EP’s corner. Piranha said you did nothing remotely legal, and you won’t see this face until I’m ready. He then said that he would give EP a chance to earn the mask, but he had to put his mask on the line. EP said he’d never done that and he never would. He’d never met a wrestler he respected enough to allow them to even challenge for his mask. Piranha said that he didn’t respect EP, so they were even. He then reminded EP that he was in a match. EP turned and walked right into a shot from Tijuana, who then put Piranha’s mask on EP backward. As he stumbled around, Tijuana levelled him with the flying forearm for the win. Piranha entered the ring and assured Tijuana he meant no harm to him. He pulled his mask off EP. Tijuana offered to help him removed EP’s mask, but Piranha said he wanted to do it the right way…except El Presidente is a coward.

6. Haka Tonga is back from another stint on the IR, and he is with Honest Al in a sit-down interview. Tonga talked about his career and how much wrestling meant to him. He said that he was telling this because even dreams must end. Dreams end because we wake up, and he’s just been woken up by some not-so-good news. This latest rash of injuries, starting with the concussion O’ Hooligan gave him, has broken him down hard. If he suffers any more severe injuries, he could end up crippled for life. He hates to give O’ Hooligan any credit, because he knows he will laugh it up and make a joke about it, but the truth is what it is. He announced his retirement from the ring. He will wrestle one more match, well, it won’t be a wrestling match. It will be a brawl…a fight without rules. If anyone hasn’t figured it out yet, his final opponent…no, final victim, will be O’ Hooligan. Furthermore, the match will be WoW’s first ever Steel Cage Match. Strutter, Pierre, nor the Thinker will be able to help him. Tonga’s goal is for O’ Hooligan to join him in forced retirement.

7. Zen defeated The Mad Arab. The announcers played up Zen’s surprising, and quick, success in WoW. They feel he will be in title contention very soon.

8. A clip from a talk show appearance with Average Guy and Jet Set Strutter showed them issuing challenges and insults back and forth. Guy says that Strutter can’t beat him with no title on the line so he sure can’t when all the money is at stake. For the first time since WoW’s wrestlers’ occasional appearances on this show began, the two rivals almost came to blows. Security came out and read them the riot act. If they touched one another or anybody associated with the show, WoW was done as a guest. Cooler heads prevailed and the two wrestlers left the stage by different doors.

9. Howl n’ Roar reclaim the WoW Tag team championship from Wall Street. Gothica comes out and says that she just spoke to Mr. Fantasy. Shop of Horrors would be challenging for the tag titles at Halloween Hellraiser, and like Skullgore said before, this night, of all nights, you don’t want to cross her monsters. She’s not even sure she can control them.

[cotguy130]

Weekend Wrasslin’ 10/19/80
The Ballroom
Great Crowd
747/36/**

We open with some additional footage from the talk-show appearance featuring Jet Set Strutter and Average Guy. This had been filmed by crew members who were fans of Guy’s. After both men had cleared the stage, they were told to leave the premises immediately. Accompanied by security, they exited the soundstage by separate doors. As Guy was getting into his pick-up truck, a limo squealed up, almost hitting him. Strutter jumped out and attacked Guy. He brutally beat on Guy, and then he lowered the tailgate to Guy’s truck and threw him in the bed. He jumped in the truck bed with him and applied in the 6-figure leglock. As he applied pressure, JSS yelled that maybe redneck pickup were good for something after all. Several people tried to help Guy, but JSS told them that if they came close that he would cripple them, too. Some siren noises were heard in the distance, so JSS released the hold, jumped in the back of the limo, and rode off.

1. We are back in The Ballroom for the second consecutive week. Hammerhead, with Mother Russia, defeats Michael T. Wolf. The Anti-Americans hit the ring, and Mighty Leo soon follows. Howl n’ Roar fall victim to the numbers’ game and receive a good beating.

2. The Metalheads are out. They announce the beginning of the “Metalheads Revenge Tour 1980”. Any rumors the fans may have heard of this event taking place prior to now don’t count. Today is the day, and it’s on!! MH actually starts this version of the tour (as opposed to the prior one that “didn’t’ happen”) off right with a win over Nerd Alert. The Insectoids comes out and tell MH that they’re glad to be next, and they are going to stop revenge tour version 2 off at the starting line. Sleeze says that’s fine, but this is version 1. The fans are delusional.

3. We are on the set of O’Hooligan’s pub, but Rex Spectrum’s TV is behind the bar and O’Hooligan is sitting on a chair at the bar. O’ Hooligan says that he’s the guest today as he has something to get off his chest. He talks about Tonga’s retirement. He says his only regret is leaving Tonga with one match left. Spectrum asked “Why Tonga”? O’ Hooligan said it was because he was there. He wanted to make a statement with somebody and Tonga was wrong place/wrong time. He didn’t really hate him that much, but somebody had to pay the cost of trying to be a star at O’ Hooligan’s expense. He wasn’t the least bit worried about the cage match. Tonga was actually making his job easier by locking him in a cage. It was like dynamiting fish in a barrel.

4. The Schmuck over Mynx.

5. Teeny Norman over Big Thuggee.

6. Ninja Star is in the Reptile House. He tells the Ranger that he is deeply hurt by O’ Hooligan’s words that attack his “dear friend”, Haka Tonga. He will be at ringside when Tonga and O’ Hooligan have their cage match to keep The Think Tank from interfering. Ranger says that he’s spoken to Tongs a number of times since starting with WoW, and he didn’t realize that Ninja and Tonga were so close. An offended Ninja jumps up and says that he and Tonga are blood brothers who always watch each other’s back. They aren’t obligated to discuss their personal lives with anyone. He told Ranger that if you insult our friendship, you insult me, and Ninja stormed off.

7. Next up is a video montage showing Haka Tonga’s working out and rehabbing from his injuries. In voiceover, Tonga talks about what he had to endure to prepare himself for this final battle. There was a lot of pain, anger, and frustration, but when he walks out of that cage while O’Hooligan lays in the middle of the ring and does nothing but hurt, it will be worth it.

8. In a contract-on-a-pole match, The Neon Express defeat the Executers to win a title match. Chet Skye told the crowd that they wanted to be the first defense for the team that wins at Halloween Hellraiser.

9. In the main event, Lyndi Harker gets her win back from several months ago with a victory over Valley Girl. The Schmuck comes to ringside and watches the match, but nothing happens.

[cotguy130]

Halloween Hellraiser 10/31/80
Olympus Coliseum
Great Crowd
6172/44/**

1. Mother Russia comes to the ring with all three Anti-Americans. She says that she’s often asked why they have declared war on Howl n’ Roar. There appears to be something there beyond a desire for the titles. She says we want to destroy them because they are different. She’s not sure if their actually American, but it doesn’t matter. America is the standard bearer for international aggression, so they receive the most scorn. In the end, though, if you’re not like her militia, if you’re not from one of the grand nations that existed before the US was a gleam in somebody’s eye, then you’re nothing. There’s too much “nothing” in the sport of pro wrestling, and she and her men will do all they can to eradicate those who don’t matter to make room for those who do.

2. In a TV title match, Average Guy successfully defends against Skullgore. Guy is still showing a slight limp from the 6-figure Leglock Jet Set Strutter used on him in the parking lot of the studio. Skullgore went after the injury, but Guy survived the assault and held on for the win.

3. Auntie Voodoo destroys Princess Starbright in under a minute.

4. Shop of Horrors win the Tag Team Titles from Howl n’ Roar in solid match.

5. Before the main event, we are introduced to a new tag team that will be debuting soon, The Blade Blasters. The crowd loves them. They ask if the people if they would like to see them take on Shop of Horrors. The crowd roared. Gothica came out with SoH. She laughed at the Blasters audacity to challenge the champs before their first match. Lazer said that if she’s so unimpressed to let her boys off their leash and let’s go now. Slashmaster started to move but Gothica calmed him down. She told the Blasters to call when they were worthy, which would be never. Buzzsaw said that we would be eye-to-eye with your ghouls very soon.

6. In a disappointing match, Arizona Chance successfully defended the WoW Title against Pierre the Enormous with the Thinker. JSS and O’ Hooligan had been barred from the arena. Against talented competition, Pierre was limited in what he could do and Chance exploited that.

[cotguy130]

Superstar Saturday 11/1/80
Empire Gardens
Great Crowd
995/39/**

1. Mighty Leo and Brit Buckingham went to a Double countout. Once again, the Anti-Americans attacked. Michael T Wolf made the save, and it looked like they would be ok until Mother Russian hit Wolf with the Russian flag pole. That gave her boys the advantage, and they took it.

2. Red Pirate Rogers won a 3-way with Johnny Kobra and Zen.

3. The Metalheads are feeling confidant after starting “Revenge Tour Part 2” off with a big win over Nerd Alert. Their confidence would be short-lived however as, instead of The Insectoids music playing, we got the Blade Blasters. The Blaster came out carrying The Insects over their shoulders, to which Sleeze said that he wishes other teams would stop beating up our opponents before we do. Lazer said his money would’ve been on The Insectoids since, from what he’s seen, The Metalheads suck. The Blasters go on to win easily. Afterwards, a groggy Sleeze said that when the Revenge Tour starts up again…for the second time…the Blasters are being added to the group of people that he and Dizzy want to get revenge on…again. He thinks.

4. Auntie Voodoo over Sgt. Shipley. The Schmuck appears on the videoscreen and tells Auntie Voodoo that he’s decided she will be his next example of male superiority. Auntie says anytime, any place, little coward.

5. Crash over L’il Thuggee by DQ when Big Thuggee interferes.

6. Jet Set Strutter over Average Guy in a non-title match. The win guarantees JSS a title shot. JSS targets the lower leg, which is still showing the effects of the sneak attack a few weeks back.

7. Michael T. Wolf over Vladimir the Cruel. The ref said that all partners and managers were barred from ringside even after the match or face suspension and fines. The match itself was uneventful in terms of extracurricular business. However, as soon as Wolf passed through the entrance way to the back, he was attacked by Buckingham and Hammerhead. Vlad followed right behind and joined in. Mighty Leo didn’t come to his aid, but a different backstage camera revealed a downed Leo being attended to in a locker room. Other wrestlers finally ran the A-A off.

8. In his retirement match inside a steel cage, Haka Tonga defeated O’ Hooligan with a Supah Tonga Leap off the cage. Tonga dominated most of the match. Ninja Star came out after the match with Mr. Bonsai. He congratulated Tonga. Tonga said that he was confused like the Reptile Ranger about Ninja’s statements the other night. Even Bonsai agreed, adding that Ninja’s appearance on Ranger’s show violated their agreement. Ninja said that we can talk about this later. I want to celebrate with my best friend. Tonga asked where all that was coming from, since they weren’t really that close. He appreciated Ninja’s willingness to watch his back, even though that’s what the cage is for plus the fact that Ninja didn’t actually come out. Ninja replied that he got detained. Bonsai asked Ninja what he was talking about. He was in the back reading a book the whole time. Ninja told Bonsai to shut up. Tonga defended Bonsai, and then said he had to go celebrate. Ninja said why can’t we celebrate her and now. Bonsai asked what was on Ninja’s mind, and Ninja told him to shut up followed by a shinobi kick right to the face. Tonga turned to help Bonsai and Ninja slammed him with the handle of his samurai sword. He beat down Tonga. Great Ginzu came out with a canvas bag. They bowed to one another and GG said that the masters are pleased with your evolution and his work was done. He would be reporting back to Japan, and he left the ring. Tonga crawled out during this exchange. Ninja opened the bag and dumped out the original WoW World Championship. Fantasy and Chance came out and tried to enter the cage but Ninja had locked it and had the key with him. Fantasy was yelling for somebody to get some bolt cutters. Ninja held up both belts. He said his proved he’s the best cruiserweight, and he knows he’s the best at any weight. He asked Chance if he wanted a shot at his world title. He reminded Fantasy and Chance that both of them had promised a title shot to whoever returned the belt. He said he wasn’t returning it until somebody beat him for it. He considered himself champ because he should’ve been all this time. Fantasy called him delusional, and threatened to strip him of the cruiserweight title. The bolt cutters arrived, but as they were preparing to cut the lock, Star Boy ran down and whispered to Fantasy, who told the crew guy with the cutters to hold. Star Boy climbed the cage and dropped into the ring. Fantasy said that he was making a Cruiserweight Title match right now with Mr. Bonsai as special referee.

9. Star Boy won the Cruiserweight title from Ninja Star in the steel cage. Mr. Bonsai grabbed one of the title belts and hit Ninja with the belt. Star Boy went for the pin, Bonsai counted obviously quickly, and many thought Ninja kicked out right before 3. The bell rung however and Fantasy had the ring announcer declare Star Boy the new Cruiserweight Champion. Ninja went after Bonsai, but the lock was cut and Arizona Chance entered the cage. While Chance was checking on Bonsai and Star Boy, Ninja climbed out of the cage with the World Title. Fantasy tried to grab it, but Ninja threw something in his eyes and fled through the crowd.

[Thumper Moore III]

That’s bonkers. In a great way. Would you please consider writing for the WWE?

[cotguy130]

Sunday Night Slam 11/9/80
Boston Arena
Sold Out
890/36/**

1. We open with a Trios match featuring The Insectoids and Pat Cabbage versus The Slave Drivers and The Mad Arab. The announcers remind us that the Survival Series will be coming up at the end of the month, and you will see several Trios-style matches on that card. The Drivers and The Arab get the win.

2. The Blade Blasters go to a double countout with Ghoul & Goblin. Once G&G realize they are overmatched, they take off. The Blasters choose to follow and remain on the attack. The brawl continues well after the bell and announcement of the winner.

3. The Schmuck continues his questionable run with a victory over Auntie Voodoo. This is his toughest match yet. He gets on the mic and says that some people are accusing him of “cherry-picking’’ his opponents, as in challenging only those he thinks he can beat. He says that they are right. Why would he challenge someone he didn’t think he could beat? That would be stupid. The thing is that he can beat any woman on the roster. To prove it, he’s giving an open challenge. “Any woman that wants to try me just needs to let me know. When it’s all said and done, you will be added to list of those who weren’t worthy to be in the ring with a man like me.”

4. The Piranha and El Presidente are in the ring surrounded by security. Piranha says that you know why I’m here. EP says that you want a mask vs. mask match, and the answer is no. You are not worthy enough of an opponent to risk my mask against. Masks are about honor and respect, and I don’t respect you and you have no honor. Piranha says that if I’m such a weak opponent then prove it by beating me. You won’t do that, so you’re a coward hiding behind words like “honor”. EP says that I unmasked you once and you refused to reveal your face. That’s dishonor. Piranha responds that it was dishonorable the way you stole it. EP says that’s the past, and you will never get a shot at this mask.

5. Arizona Chance is up next; he’s wearing the main WoW title belt. He says that the last few days in WoW have been very unusual. Fantasy called him into the office for a meeting with him and Ninja Star. Ninja showed up without the belt, and said he didn’t trust Fantasy and Chance not to double-cross him. Fantasy presented the contract for the title match and they both signed it. Ninja then gave Fantasy a key and said the belt is in a storage locker at Grand Central Station in New York. Fantasy wasn’t happy about that. Then, when Fantasy tries to arrange the date for the match, Ninja says they can address that when he returns from Japan. When pressed as to when that might be, he replies, “In My Time”. Now, he’s not sure what the future holds. Next week, there will be a three-way match to find his next challenger. This won’t be a #1 contender, because the three participants are being chosen at random. It could be anybody. He also addresses Pierre the Enormous. He understands that Pierre believed that by aligning with The Thinker he would receive more title opportunities. Instead, he’s trashed a bunch of friendships, and if the rumors turn out to be true…he paused and said that wasn’t for him to talk about. The fans would find out soon enough.

6. Wall Street over The B-Boys.

7. Juan Tijuana over Pelvis Presley with Big Boss, Jr.

8. The Metalheads are in the interview area. They run Honest Al off. Sleeze is practically frothing at the mouth as he rants about their recent run in the tag team division. He gets all the names mixed up, referring to the “Neon Nerds” and “The Boy Blasters”. Dizzy, who never talks, tries to correct him and Cesar tells him to go back to not talking. He finally composes himself and says they have it all figured out. No more “revenge tour part A, B, C1, D3” crap. They will move up the tag ranks by getting rid of the other teams. Literally, they will cease to exist after a series of “losing team breaks up” matches. He would think of a cooler name later. By the time this is over, the Metalheads will be the champs because there won’t be anyone else to give it to. They’re going to start with Nerd Alert, although they don’t think they will accept the challenge. Immediately, Nerd Alert walk out and Herman says “we accept the challenge”. Waldo said that they’ve talked to all the other teams that the Metalheads are mad at, and they’ve agreed to put The ‘Heads out of everyone else’s misery. They begin to laugh, and Cesar asks what’s so funny. Waldo replies that the other teams look at The ‘Heads like they would a common Diptera. Cesar obviously doesn’t know what that means. Waldo says that you two are mosquitos to be swatted away.

9. Dude Brohan gets a clean win over Pierre the Enormous. Before the match, he tries to talk to Pierre, but The Thinker won’t let his man listen.

[cotguy130]

Weekend Wrasslin’ 11/15/80
Golden Plaza
Sold Out
1127/42/**

1. The Blade Blasters over The Insectoids.

2. In a 3-way match to find Arizona Chance’s challenger at Survival Series, Troglo defeats Ace Arcadium and Vladimir the Cruel.

3. Reptile Ranger is with Honest Al. He admits he made a mistake. He admits he didn’t take Pelvis Presley seriously enough. He figured he was a two-bit Elvis wannabe not worthy to perform at your deaf granny’s birthday party. He is a two-bit Elvis wannabe not worthy to perform at your deaf granny’s birthday party, but he’s got a mean streak that he didn’t expect. Most animals are scared of humans, even the predators. They only hurt people when cornered. Ranger said that he cornered Presley when he tried to embarrass him with the rubber reptiles, and Presley responded more viciously than expected. Sadly, for Presley, this response was an error in judgment. Not only did Ranger get hurt by the choke out, he got embarrassed himself. Elvis impersonators are the lowest form of entertainment, and getting choked out by a bad Elvis impersonator is really sad. Ranger says he no longer takes Presley lightly, and he’s going to get some painful payback. He says their next match will a lumberjack match since Presley likes to run when the heat’s on. Ranger says I will bring four friends, and you surely can pay four people to pretend to like you. After I pin you, I’m going to drop a big ol’ snake right on your face.

4. Lyndi Harker defeated Chaka Crass.

5. Zap over Cletus Mullet. After the bell, Zeke Mullet attacked Zap, but Boombox made the quick save.

6. We go to a commercial for the next P4V, Survival Series. Arizona Chance will defend against Troglo. Chance says he’s looking forward to this match because it will be a refreshing change-of-pace. Troglo is an unusual “person” with an unusual style, and he’s excited about the challenge. O’ Hooligan talks about teaming with the rest of The Think Tank against Dude Brohan, Average Guy, and Ace Arcadium. We close with Howl n’ Roar revealing that they will have a mystery partner against The Anti-Americans. They say it’s someone very familiar with The Antis, and if they think of the last person they want to see across the ring from them, it’s probably him.

7. In a slight upset, Supernova defeated Wall St.

8. The latest edition of O’ Hooligan’s Pub is here, and his guest is his teammate, Pierre. Both men quickly agree that Pierre’s recent losses were the result of a continued conspiracy against the Giant. They both look forward to Survival Series so that they can get Brohan and Guy in the ring at the same time and deal with them. Ace Arcadium will wish he hadn’t agreed to help Brohan because now he’s a target. At this point, Brohan comes on set. O’ Hooligan says he banned from the pub, but Brohan coldcocks him out of nowhere. Pierre goes after Brohan, but Dude stands his ground. He asks Pierre if he wants to fight, or will he listen to something that will fix a lot of wrongs. Pierre stops, but The Thinker runs on the set and tells Pierre it’s time to go. O’ Hooligan comes to and grabs a stool. Brohan says that he’s not here for trouble, but to prove that Thinker is a low-down creep who is using Pierre. Jet Set Strutter then enters, and Average Guy and Ace Arcadium quickly back up Brohan. We go to commercial as the two sides are squaring off.

9. We’re back, and security has defused the situation. Average Guy, who is defending the TV Title against Jet Set Strutter in the next match is heading back to the ring. Strutter attacks him from behind in the aisle. After the refs break it up, the head official asks Guy if he wants to continue. Thinker says that if Guy backs out then it’s a forfeit and JSS takes the belt. Guy says he would never consider backing out. Unfortunately, he shows the effects of the attack for most of the match and Jet Set Strutter takes advantage of it to win the match and claim the TV Title.

[cotguy130]

Survival Series 11/27/80
Silver Stadium
Sold Out
15070/47/***

The announcers welcome the fans to what they hope will become a Thanksgiving Evening tradition, The Survival Series. The first match will be a Survival Series match featuring The Anti-Americans, with Mother Russia, against Howl n’ Roar and their mystery partner. That mystery partner is arriving right now, and they send us to Honest Al outside the arena. There’s a group gathered outside, including The Anti-Americans who are jeering at everybody else. Mother says that whatever happens, there is no part of it that worries them in the slightest. A few seconds later, a helicopter appears over the Stadium and heads for an area near the group. Upon landing, Howl n’ Roar get out. The Anti-Americans rush in as soon as they clear the blades. A figure in camo charges out and tackles Brit Buckingham. He gets to his feet and everyone can see it’s Warhawk. He yells at the A-As to meet him in the ring and runs toward the loading dock door.

1. We go back inside the Stadium. Seconds later, Warhawk, with Howl n’ Roar right behind, enter the arena and rush the ring. The Anti-Americans follow suit, and all 6 men are quickly brawling all over ringside. The ref somehow manages to restore order and the match continues in conventional style. This only lasts so long considering the parties involved. Another brawl erupts, and in the middle of it Hammerhead takes out Wolf with the Russian Sickle for the first elimination. Vladimir the Cruel has Warhawk in the Carpathian Claw, and it looks as though he might submit. Mother Russia and Hammerhead are working over Leo with the flagpole. In desperation, he grabs the pole and nails both of them. He climbs the turnbuckle from the outside and hits Vlad with the Thunderstrike out of nowhere. Warhawk falls on Vlad for the pin. Leo drags Warhawk to the corner so that he can tag himself in, and walks into a flagpole shot from Mother. Hammerhead pins him. Hammerhead and Buckingham work over Warhawk for a while, and Hammerhead even picks up Warhawk at the two count of a likely successful pin. Hammerhead goes for the Sickle, but Warhawk ducks it and forearms Buckingham off the apron onto Mother. Hammerhead charges and Warhawk hotshots him across the top rope and gets the pin. Buckingham enters the ring, and after a brief exchange of moves he hits the Britain Bulldog for the win.

2. The crowd chants “We want your mask” as El Presidente tries to speak. He tells them that they are wasting his time and their breath. He has explained repeatedly why Piranha will never get a match with masks on the line. He wants to talk about what he wants in WoW. The crowd taunts and jeers. We see Piranha in the crowd leading them on. EP tells him to come to the ring, and Piranha does so. Before they start fighting, several wrestlers break them up. Piranha yells that he will get that match, by right or wrong. EP says "dia frio el infierno”.

3. In the second survival match, Dude Brohan, Average Guy, and Ace Arcadium take on The Think Tank. Dude’s team gets a 3-0 clean sweep when he finishes off Pierre with a Big Bro Leg Drop. Earlier on, Ace had eliminated Strutter with Game Over, and Guy put away O’ Hooligan with the Average Elbow. After the match, Dude’s team cornered The Thinker. They each teased giving him their finisher but pulled up short out of faux concern for his well-being. He tried to leave the ring, but Brohan grabbed the cuff of his pants. Thinker intentionally undid his pants and slipped out of them to escape, revealing boxers with hearts on them. The crowd enjoyed his embarrassment. He finally ran up the aisle leaving his team behind.

4. We’re in the cemetery with Gothica’s team. She is there, but in the background. Skullgore does all the talking. He shows off the Tag Team Champions, and says that he will have the title of his choice soon. He throws a glance at Gothica and says that he expects more out of some of the cabal. Gothica steps up and tells him not to refer to her in such a way. She’s the leader, and he speaks because she allows it and for no other reason. Skullgore flashes anger across his face, and then backs down. He tells her he apologizes for his insolence, and begs her forgiveness. She replies that he isn’t the only one expecting more out of a member of the cabal.

5. Arizona Chance successfully defends the World Title against Troglo. It is a different kind of match than Chance was used to, and it showed in that he was out of his rhythm at times. He focused himself, and went on to win. After Chance left the ring, Troglo sat glumly in the middle for a long time. Finally, Mad Arab came to the ring. He and Troglo conversed briefly, and Troglo left with the Arab.

[cotguy130]

Superstar Saturday 12/6/80
Boston Arena
Sold Out
1415/41/***

1. We open with an episode of Teeny’s Playhouse. His guests are Princess Starbright, Sgt. Shipley, and Mynx. Norman is like a pre-teen trying to talk to a pretty girl in Jr. High and can barely get a word out. Starbright makes it worse by trying to encourage him to talk. The Sarge puts an end to it by saying that they can do this without him. Shipley says that it’s tough to admit, but The Schmuck’s success in the ladies’ division has frankly becomes an embarrassment to them. They are here to answer his open challenge, but it won’t be any of them. In fact, since Schmuck’s so confidant in his superiority, who it is won’t matter. Next time Schmuck feels like showing his face, his challenge will be answered.

2. Pelvis Presley, with Big Boss, Jr., talks about his win over Reptile Ranger. He showed off his new alligator skin shoes, and said only the top Elvises can afford shoes like this. He’s too good for Vegas. He only works private parties for the King’s biggest and wealthiest fans. He demands Mr. Fantasy reward an entertainer of his stature for his success in taking out Reptile Ranger. He will be looking for a contract very soon for some type of match worthy of his efforts…like with a title at stake.

3. The Blade Blasters over Ghoul & Goblin.

4. Chaka Crass picks up her first win with a victory over Glam.

5. Big Thuggee over Rad Racer. L’il Thuggee attacks for the double-team and Crash makes the save.

6. El Presidente and Ace Arcadium are the ring for the next match. Ace asks for a mic. He asks EP if he would be considered worthy for a mask match provided he had something of equal value. EP said that Ace’s reputation and success record would make him a worthy challenger. Ace said that he’d gotten to know Piranha lately and while the guy’s an annoying little sonuvagun, he’s recently been less annoying and he deserves a big chance. EP said that he’s not getting a mask match. Ace said to hold on, and listen to his offer. Ace said that if I beat you, then you give Piranha a mask v. mask match. EP said no. Ace said what if I were authorized to offer you this. He handed EP a document. EP read the cover page. He asked if it were authentic, and Ace told him to check out Fantasy’s signature. EP was obviously excited by what he was reading. Ace said that he thinks El Presidente is going to want a pen. He began motioning, and the ref handed him a pen. EP flipped to the last page and signed quickly. The ref took the pen and document back and whispered to the ring announcer. The ring announcer said that this match now had the following condition. If Ace Arcadium wins, The Piranha gets a mask v. mask match. If El Presidente wins, he gets a WoW World Title match. EP said the Piranha stipulation won’t matter since he’s getting that title shot, and he turned out to be correct. El Presidente defeats Ace Arcadium to claim a WoW World title match. Mr. Fantasy came out and said that this match would be contested at December’s P4V event, Beyond Wardome, to be held at the Puro Dome in Japan.

7. Skullgore, with Gothica, over Chameleon Kid with Princess Starbright. Gothica taunts the Princess about her man’s loss, and Starbright slaps her across the face.

8. Hammerhead over Warhawk when Brit Buckingham distracts the ref. This allows Mother Russian to get a cheap-shot with the flag pole. Hammerhead hits the Russian Sickle for the win.

9. O’ Hooligan wins the Cruiserweight Championship by defeating Star Boy with Mr. Bonsai.

[cotguy130]

Sunday Night Slam 12/14/80
The Ballroom
Great Crowd
775/34/**

1. The opening bout features Supernova against a new team dubbed “Barbaric Nature” by Mr. Tycoon, The Mad Arab and Troglo. Tycoon accompanied them to the ring, and said that he was only here for one reason. He wanted Supernova to know who had paid for their demise. When Supernova got lucky and beat Wall St. a few weeks back, he and Yuppie decided the pay somebody to take care of things for them since ‘Nova aren’t worth Wall St.’s time. He’s not sure if Troglo even knows what money is, but The Arab was glad to have it. The Arab and Troglo defeat Supernova with the discreet use of a foreign object, and the Fat Camel Clutch on Moon Man.

2. In a non-title match, Arizona Chance defeats Zombie Punk.

3. Ace Arcadium defeats Pierre the Enormous with The Thinker. Ace grabs a mic and asks Pierre what the Hell happened to him. He reminds him that he used to win all the time. Now, since he’s let the Thinker get in his head, he’s been sucking. The Thinker replied that the transition has been difficult from being a guy who cared what the idiot fans think to a guy who realizes that they’re idiots. Pierre yelled, “You’re all idiots”, to which Thinker replied, “see, he’s starting to get it”. Once Pierre gets his new mindset settled, he will be the threat to anyone and everyone that he’s always been.

4. Valley Girl over Mynx.

5. The Mullet Cousins are on video standing in front of this shack that looks like it might fall at any moment. Cletus says this is the house they grew up in. It means a lot to both of them, but now they are in the big time. Because they got real jobs beatin’ people up in WoW, they can EACH by a doublewide. Zeke’s is hooked up to the county water so Cletus doesn’t have to go to the well every day. He takes his Saturday night bath in Zeke’s big ol’ tub. They’re both excited where they came from and excited where they’re going. Before they get there, though, they gots some folks to take care of. You see, these folks back home don’t rightly like rap music. It’s either hillbilly banjo pickin’ or nothing’. Every time they watch WoW on their black n’ white TVs, they see these B-Boys with the rap music. Granny don’t like the rap music so she asked Zeke and Cletus to make them stop playing it. So, they got that business to take care of. Even worse, they heard from all the lady kinfolk about those Blade Blasters. They couldn’t stop talking about their big muscles and their pretty hair. Cousin Brandine even asked Cletus if she could get a date with Buzzsaw. Cletus and Zeke don’t much care for a couple of muscled up pretty boys drawing their womens’ eye, so they gotta do something about them. After they make the B-Boys and the Blade Blasters go away, they’re going to win the tag titles and come back right here to the old house and celebrate. At that, Zeke slaps the wall of the house…and the whole thing comes crashing down in a pile of rotted plywood and tin. Cletus tells Zeke they gotta get out of there before Granny sees what they done or she will whip both of them.

6. Our next match is the last match for the Metalheads as a tag team. They lose to Nerd Alert, and per the stipulation demanded by the Metalheads themselves, they must split up as the losing team. The crowd gives them the usual, “Hey Hey Goodbye” chant. Cesar says that he’s not going anywhere, and he doesn’t know or care what Lixx the Poser’s plans are. Dizzy reminds him that Cesar was the one who just got pinned and cost them the team. Cesar shoves Dizzy down and leaves.

7. Skullgore, with Gothica, over Juan Tijuana.

8. El Presidente talks about his upcoming title match with Arizona Chance. He says it’s appropriate that it’s in Japan, as the sophisticated wrestling fans there appreciate him like none other save his home country of Mexico. He calls the US fans “uncultured dreck” who support unworthy wrestlers like The Piranha. He will be proud to take WoW from the unwashed masses in the US and show the rest of the world and their wrestling fans who matter what a world champion looks like.

9. In a lumberjack match, Pelvis Presley defeats Reptile Ranger. Ranger’s four lumberjacks were Red Pirate Rogers, Chameleon Kid, Pat Cabbage, and World Champion Arizona Chance. Presley’s four were Mandonna, Cesar Sleeze, Johnny Kobra, and Officer Chip (who replaced Dizzy Lixx). The lumberjacks were placed so that there was one ‘jack representing each competitor on each of the four sides to start the match. The pushing and shoving between the ‘jacks started almost immediately. Ranger’s ‘jacks had more to do as Presley was constantly trying to leave. The finish came when Big Boss, Jr. who had not remained at ringside, snuck his way down. He grabbed the bag that Ranger’s snake was in and tried to run. In the confusion, he handed Presley his cigar. Presley stuck the cigar in Ranger’s face and held it while his ‘jacks distracted the ref. Finally, Ranger’s screams of pain drew the ref back and Presley tossed the cigar out of the ring. Ranger’s ‘jacks tried to tell what happened, but Sleeze grabbed the cigar and started smoking it. Presley hit the Heartbreaker and pinned Ranger. As soon as the ref announced the winner, all four of Presley’s ‘jacks attacked Arizona Chance. His fellow ‘jacks came to his aid and the brawl was on. Big Boss came out and Presley slipped away during the melee. Ranger was trapped in the ring by the fighting and the medical team couldn’t get to him. El Presidente came to the ring and attacked Chance after Ranger’s ‘jacks had pulled the others off him. The Piranha came through the crowd and ran off EP after grabbing his mask from behind and getting a few laces undone. Presley’s ‘jacks left with Presidente as Ranger finally got medical attention.

[cotguy130]

Weekend Wrasslin’ 12/20/18
Boston Arena
Decent Crowd
485/38/**

1. Warhawk over Hammerhead to avenge an earlier loss. Mother Russian and her associates are banned from ringside during this match. As soon as the match is over, they charge the ring, but Warhawk gets away.

2. The Mullet Cousins over The B-Boys. After the pin, Zeke grabs Boombox’ Boombox and they get away with it.

3. In a cruiserweight 3-way match, Pat Cabbage defeats Teeny Norman and Chameleon Kid.

4. Auntie Voodoo over Lyndi Harker. A despondent Harker got a mic and started to say something, but then dropped it and walked off.

5. Cesar Sleeze singles’ career starts off better than his tag career when he gets a win over Moon Man.

6. We cut to backstage where Pelvis Presley approaches Mr. Fantasy’s office and knocks on the door. We hear Fantasy say come in. Arizona Chance is in the office with Fantasy. Chance jumps up and starts after Presley, but Fantasy orders him to calm down. Chance asks Presley if he understands the damage he could’ve done with that cigar. Presley replies “Could’ve done? Next time I’ll try harder”. This makes Chance jump up again. Presley says that what he did to Ranger was nothing to the psychological damage that Ranger’s done to him all these months by trying to upset him with all these reptiles, real and fake. He had to cancel some high-profile gigs with some important people because of Ranger’s actions. Chance says there’s no comparison in the two. Presley tells him to shut up, as he’s here for Fantasy. Presley says he deserves a high-profile reward for defeating Reptile Ranger cleanly. Fantasy points at Chance before he can even move or speak. Fantasy asks what he’s got in mind, and Presley says a title match would be appropriate. The increased income he would gain after becoming champion would offset his losses from the cancelled gigs. Fantasy asks Chance if he’d like to get his hands on Presley, and Chance says of course.

Fantasy replies that in that case, Presley will get a world title match after the first of the year. Chance is dumbfounded. Presley starts singing “Love Me Tender”. Chance asks if all one has to do to get a title match is come in and act like a jerk. Fantasy says it depends on my mood, and right now you’ve both put me in a bad one. I don’t feel like dealing with his crap, and you want to fight him anyhow. Fantasy then tells Presley to stop singing, leave, and shut the door behind him. We see Chance protesting as the door shuts, and Presley walks off singing “Hound Dog”.

7. Howl n’ Roar over The Executors.

8. Skullgore and Shop of Horrors are in the ring. He says that there may be some confusion as to who leads this group. He says that he is declaring right now that he is…Gothica’s music comes out and she walks to the ring. She asks him what he is, what he was about to say. Skullgore says the only thing he is…is beholden to his Queen of the Night for all the success he’s enjoyed in WoW. She replies that’s what she thought, but she needed to hear it up close. She orders SoH to the back and they hesitate slightly before leaving. She tells Skullgore that all mic time is to go through her, and he knows that. He says “Yes my Queen. It won’t happen again”.

9. In a rematch for the TV title, Average Guy regains the belt from Jet Set Strutter in a 5-star match. The Thinker immediately says he invoking Strutter’s rematch clause, and he wants the match to be in the Puro Dome at the Beyond Wardome P4V.

[cotguy130]

WoW Awards Banquet 12/27/80
Aragawa Steakhouse
Tokyo, Japan

The first annual WoW awards dinner was held at one of the most prestigious, and expensive restaurants in Tokyo. After introductory remarks from Mr. Fantasy, we go straight to the presentation ceremony. We start with the Most Hated category, whose slate of nominees and eventual winner were determined by the fans.

The Nominees were:
Pierre the Enormous
O’ Hooligan
Ninja Star
Mr. Tycoon
El Presidente

The winner, as selected by the fans, was Ninja Star. Ninja was not here to accept the award, as his whereabouts were unknown. Fantasy was accepting on behalf of Ninja when O’ Hooligan ran up, grabbed it, and said he had some prepared remarks if he had one that were just as relevant. Nobody on the list of nominee’s cares what the fans think, and they are thrilled the fans know this well enough to hate them. He assured the fans that the feeling was mutual.

Next up was most popular. This award was also determined by the fans.

The nominees were:
Dude Brohan
Arizona Chance
Haka Tonga
Average Guy
Star Boy

The winner, as selected by the fans, was Arizona Chance. Chance offered a few quick words of appreciation, and said that these awards do mean something to the wrestlers who realize how important the fans are. He feels that Haka Tonga should’ve won it due to all he had to go through in 1980. O’ Hooligan shouted an inappropriate response and Chance was removing his jacket to go after him, but Fantasy intervened.

Next up was Tag Team of the Year. The next two awards were determined by a formula that factored in everything about their matches over the course of the year.

The nominees were:
Wall Street
Howl n’ Roar
The Neon Express
Shop of Horrors
The B-Boys

The award went to…Howl n’ Roar. Leo and Wolf graciously accepted. Mr. Tycoon was overheard whispering to Yuppie VP something about “not paying (unintelligible) enough to get the job done”. Yuppie whispered back “you said that’d be us”





We close the ceremonies with Wrestler of the Year

The nominees were:
Dude Brohan
Arizona Chance
Ninja Star
Average Guy
Star Boy

The award went to…Dude Brohan. The room was loud between the cheers and catcalls. The latter came from those wrestlers who did not share a good relationship with the fans, and was led by The Think Tank. Brohan offered the customary thanks, and then called up Arizona Chance. He said Chance should be sharing this award with him. He changed gears and said that he and Chance wanted to talk to Pierre about something, and now was a good time since they had a mic and Pierre was a captive audience. Thinker jumped up and said “that’s what you think”, and ordered The Think Tank to leave. Strutter, O’ Hooligan, and Pierre followed him out, and at the last minute Mr. Tycoon jumped up and joined the group leaving. Even Yuppie VP seemed confused. Brohan said that he was going to talk to Pierre, and tell him what he knows one day. Chance says that Pierre needs to hear this. Chance sits and Brohan concludes his speech. Suddenly, the lights go out. When they come back on, Brohan is laying on the dais unconscious. A man dressed like Ninja Star, except all in white, yells “It’s My Time” in Japanese. He switches to English and says that Brohan’s and Chance’s wins in these awards are jokes, and so is his win for most hated. O’ Hooligan was right; the fans are “moronzu”. They hate him for doing an honorable thing and going after what’s been denied him? They know nothing of honor. He then draws his katana and slices Brohan’s trophy in half. “Sore wa watashi no monodenakereba naranai” or “This should be mine”. He leaps off the dais and heads into the kitchen. Security follows him out the back door. Standing in the parking lot, he turns to look at the security, and says “Ichido hoshi ga atta basho wa ima wa kagedesu” or “Where there was once star is now shadow”. He steps into a shadow provided by the building and streetlights, and is gone.