|
|
Post by Kip Whistler on May 16, 2023 17:22:59 GMT -5
Greetings, grapple fans!
We're in for a collision of epic proportions, as tonight's main event will see a rematch between Big Waves and The Tag Team OF DOOM! A few weeks back Buffalo & DOOM managed to pick up a victory over the history making duo of Pierre & Chesterton. Last week during our lumberjack match we saw these four men antagonize each other. Pierre has called upon his old friend Troglo to help he and Shredsbury to combat the antics of Buffalo & DOOM. Will Troglo's presence at ringside be enough to tip the scales in Big Waves' favor? Or will The Tag Team OF DOOM pick up yet another victory over the longest reigning tag champs in JWA history? We're about to find out!
(The polls will be open for at least 24 hours. It doesn't matter who you vote for, just that you participate!)
Last week was absolute chaos when we saw JWA World Heavyweight Champion "Relentless" Conor Caine and Mack Caliber defeat the JWA World Tag Team Champions "Lord" Taylor Thorin & Duke Mongoose in a non-title lumberjack match. It was a complete melee that saw Caine and Caliber get the victory, showing that perhaps the tag champions aren't able to get the job done without the unfair advantage that their cornermen often provide. Does this mean that Caine and Caliber, the recently christened "Relentless Aggression", will be throwing their hat into the ring to challenge for the tag titles?
In all the insanity of last week's main event, we witnessed the return of none other than Bad Luck Bradley! The bad luck wrestler himself rose out of a sea of humanity and helped to construct a makeshift scaffold which Mack Caliber used to launch himself onto the lumberjacks at ringside, a maneuver that directly led to Conor Caine scoring a victory over Taylor Thorin. Now that Brad's back, where will he set his sights?
In the wake of last week's match, we saw on social media that Duke Mongoose and Penguino got into a war of words, as did Conor Caine and "Lord" Taylor Thorin's assistant, Tembleberry. That's why next week we'll have a one-on-one match between Duke and Penguino, and the following week we'll have a handicap match pitting "Relentless" Conor Caine against Tembleberry and The Earl of Jackson.
We expect to be joined later on tonight by JWA World Women's Champion Daisy Turner with an update on the quarterfinal round of the Daisy World Cup. I know I've said it every week, but just as a reminder, these ladies are battling not only for the trophy but for a spot on the JWA roster. Best of luck to all the remaining competitors!
Tommy End has made his intentions known now that he's back in JWA: He wants to face Red Pirate Rogers. Last week End refused to work as a lumberjack, stating that he won't be physical in JWA until he gets the match with Rogers. We haven't heard from Rogers in weeks. Will he accept The Dutch Destroyer's challenge?
Let's send it down to Mick LeRay and "Savvy" Sean Beeman to start the show. Get out there and work your gimmick!
|
|
|
|
Post by Pierre The Enormous on May 16, 2023 17:31:41 GMT -5
*Rapture by Ross Bugden plays as Big Waves and Troglo make their way to the ring and Troglo is seen feasting on chili dogs*
LeRay: Here comes Big Waves
Beeman: Oh great now Chesterton has two neanderthals to hang out with....
LeRay: OH BE QUIET!
Chesterton: Let's settle this mates
Pierre: *I nod as Chesterton leaps off my shoulders and Troglo roars at ringside*
|
|
Chad Shredsbury
Main Eventer
The tide cannot be turning… there’s gold on the horizon
Posts: 318
|
Post by Chad Shredsbury on May 16, 2023 17:35:31 GMT -5
The crowd roars as “Could Have Been Me” hits and Chesterton Shredsbury surfs out on Pierre’s Enormous shoulders waving his Big Waves Board over his head. Limping behind them is Troglo.
LeRay. Here come the former champs with Troglo in tow as expected. And frankly I’m not sure what to expect from this trip tonight but I’m sure it won’t be good for the Tag Team of Doom.
Beeman. The Tag Team of Doom are on fire right now and are the rightful number one contenders to the gold after beating these chumps last month.
LeRay. That’s an interesting observation since the reigning champs lost a non title match just last week to Relentless Aggression.
Beeman. That was a railroading spearheaded by jealous and inferior athletes! I don’t want to talk about it. Let’s talk instead about the delusional sociopath your favorite team is bringing to the ring right now!
|
|
|
|
Post by Pierre The Enormous on May 16, 2023 17:40:53 GMT -5
LeRay: Troglo looks as dangerous as he was all those years ago
Beeman: He won't last 5 minutes at ringside....
LeRay: Wanna bet?
Beeman: Loser buys dinner
LeRay: Deal....
|
|
|
|
Post by Pierre The Enormous on May 16, 2023 18:08:51 GMT -5
*Buffalo and DOOM make their way to the ring elaborate entrance and all*
Beeman: Now there's a tag team....
LeRay: Sure Beeman.....
*Troglo thumps his chest at Buffalo who blows a raspberry at him which gets the caveman riled up*
LeRay: He's poking a bear....
Beeman: Correction a Neanderthal....
LeRay: Oh hush....
*The action starts with Pierre and Buffalo charging at each other*
|
|
|
|
Post by Penguino on May 16, 2023 19:19:40 GMT -5
Before the Tag Team Of Dooms entrance we see a pre recorded video of Penguino with Johnny Kobra by his side.
Penguino “So how are we doing this Mongoose, are we banning all members from ringside for our match next week or is Johnny going to kick the ever loving bleak out of all of your goons and Bored Taylor Thorn in my bleak.”
Kobra “It’s all up to you Cookey Dukey so make your choice before next week”
In a slow fade Penguino and Johnny Kobra repeat “Make your choice” over and over again until the feed cuts out
|
|
|
|
Post by The Greatest Wrestler OF DOOM on May 16, 2023 19:47:41 GMT -5
They clash heads and don’t even flinch! Peire picks up buffalo and body slams him out of the ring!
Beeman: chapter 4749! Section 246!
Leray: here we go again.
Beeman:he cheated!
Leray: Beeman, there isn’t even 1000 chapters.
Beeman:well there is now!
|
|
Chad Shredsbury
Main Eventer
The tide cannot be turning… there’s gold on the horizon
Posts: 318
|
Post by Chad Shredsbury on May 16, 2023 20:13:49 GMT -5
LeRay. Buffalo trying to regain his composure outside the ring after a confrontation that would have taken out a lesser man beast for sure. I jut don’t understand how the Chief doesn’t understand that, while he can overpower most anyone, he just doesn’t have the mass and strength of the Enormous One!
Beeman. You know I liked the first part of what you were saying there, LeRay, but by the end you just sounded like an idiot again. Maybe next time though. Probably not but maybe.
LeRay. And now Pierre has tagged on the Dude of Wales….
Beeman. Oh brother.
LeRay. Pierre takes a knee by the ropes and Chesterton runs the ropes… he steps off Pierre’s back and swan dives onto the Chief, taking the big man down once again!
|
|
|
|
Post by Pierre The Enormous on May 16, 2023 20:50:16 GMT -5
*I scratch my back with the ring ropes to catch my breath*
|
|
|
|
Post by Daisy Turner on May 16, 2023 22:34:39 GMT -5
(Prior to match)
Daisy: All right everyone It's time to introduce to you our Semi-Finalist, here in the flesh. Staring off with... Magdalena!
Camel by Camel starts to play as Magdalena makes her way to the ring
Daisy: Introduce yourself.
Magdalena: اهلا جميعا. ماجدالينا هنا وسأذهب طوال الطريق. JWA ، لقد جئت إلى هنا
Daisy: Up next we have the legendary second generation star. Dixie Thunderbird!
Turn! Turn! Turn! plays as Dixie enters the ring
Dixie: Hey everyone. I'm going to win this tournament and make my family proud!
Daisy: That's great, up next, the sweet and fun... Sakura Watanabe!
Motteke! Sailor Fuku! plays, Sakura dances to the song and jumps in the ring
Sakura: ここまで到達するとは思ってもいませんでした。しかし、今の私は、これに勝つつもりです。
Daisy: And last but certainly not least. Winter Hex!
Winter: I guess it's a no brainer on who is winning this contest. None of these girls compare to me.
Daisy: We'll see about that, but anyways The Semi-finals are happening soon so-
Miss Jessie interrupts Daisy
Miss Jessie: Hold on. So these are girls who may be joining us. Pathetic. I mean let's see. We have 2 girls who can't even speak English, one who is here just because her daddy is famous and... Winter Hex, she's the only one I like. The other 3 are just plain loser, especially this one.
She walks over to Sakura Watanabe
Jessie: You are way to smiley for my liking, you dress like something out of a bootleg anime and can you even speak English?
Daisy: She knows one word. Go on say it, I dare you
Sakura: B*tch!
Miss Jessie is in shock. She goes to slap Sakura but Dixie catches her hand. Dixie hits her with the DDT, Magdalena picks her up and performs the Jewel of the Nile, Sakura picks her up and hits an Ushigaroshi. Winter Hex simply does nothing.
Daisy: Give it up for our Semi-Finalist Everyone!
|
|
|
|
Post by The Mean Queen Jessie Aldean on May 17, 2023 5:33:02 GMT -5
Chesterton keeps up the offense outside the ring. He jumps off the steps to the ring, the apron, and finally troglo. Beeman complains, LeRay says its strategy.
tgwod drops from the apron and runs to help, but runs into the stairs and turns away in pain back to their corner.
Chesterton goes to the top turnbuckle and aims a frog splash at buffalo...but the big chief catches him, bench presses the surfer once and then tosses him up and into the ring. Big buff gets up slowly and starts to climb back into the ring as Chesterton recovers.
|
|
|
|
Post by Duke Mongoose on May 17, 2023 6:32:59 GMT -5
Before the Tag Team Of Dooms entrance we see a pre recorded video of Penguino with Johnny Kobra by his side. Penguino “So how are we doing this Mongoose, are we banning all members from ringside for our match next week or is Johnny going to kick the ever loving bleak out of all of your goons and Bored Taylor Thorn in my bleak.” Kobra “It’s all up to you Cookey Dukey so make your choice before next week” In a slow fade Penguino and Johnny Kobra repeat “Make your choice” over and over again until the feed cuts out (Toni Cruise is backstage in front of the JWA banner standing next to a flustered Duke Mongoose) Toni: Fans, I'm here with a flustered Duke Mongoose. You'll be facing Penguino one-on-one next week and we just saw Penguino and Johnny Kobra's comments. What do you have to say? Duke: I guess maybe this is good news for Penguino and that con-artist Johnny Kobra, but you don't need to ban anyone from ringside next week. Tembleberry and The Earl of Jackson are going to be in intense training with his Lordship in preparation for the beating they're going to deliver to our "champion" Conor Caine in two weeks. Maybe having that title makes him think he's invincible or something, but where I come from only a fool openly challenges two men to a fight! Toni: So you're confirming that it'll be just you next week. No entourage? Duke: That's right, Toni, just Big Daddy Duke. Honestly, that's all I've ever needed! I'm going to slap that bird brain in the Cobra Clutch and make him wish he'd called his grandmother! Toni: Before we get back to the action, I wanted to touch briefly on something that took place last week. We saw the return of Bad Luck Bradley as a lumberjack last week, and his involvement helped tip things in the favor of Relentless Aggression. It looked like you and Bradley had a moment before he managed to avoid your attack. Duke: I can't believe Kip was dumb enough to let this clown back in JWA! The only reason he's not gone again is because he accidentally avoided having his neck broken! If he knows what's good for him, he'll stay as far away from me as possible. And don't even THINK about coming after these tag titles! Toni: Alright, thank you Duke. Mick and Sean, back to you! |
|
Chad Shredsbury
Main Eventer
The tide cannot be turning… there’s gold on the horizon
Posts: 318
|
Post by Chad Shredsbury on May 17, 2023 6:40:18 GMT -5
Beeman. As always the big Chief has powered through and turned the tide. He’s got the Welsh Waverider in trouble now. A rinning clothesline turns Shredsbury inside out! Did you see that, LeRay? He nearly did a 180 when he got hit with that Buffalo wing!
LeRay. I did see it. No doubt Chesterton is in trouble here, my Savvy colleague. And he’s trying to get up but Buffalo measures him and delivers a savage Mongolian chop!
Beeman. He nearly took Chesterton’s shoulders off his torso with that impact! Admit that you’re impressed!
LeRay. Meanwhile the Greatest Wrestler of Doom is on his feet outside the ring, and he’s arguing with Troglo about something. I’m not even sure they are exchanging words, it sounds more like animal sounds.
|
|
|
|
Post by Pierre The Enormous on May 17, 2023 7:25:38 GMT -5
Troglo: *thumps his chest at DOOM and yells*
DOOM: *thumps his chest right back at him*
Troglo: TROGLO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
|
|
Chad Shredsbury
Main Eventer
The tide cannot be turning… there’s gold on the horizon
Posts: 318
|
Post by Chad Shredsbury on May 17, 2023 8:53:05 GMT -5
Beeman. That idiot Troglo had better leave the Greatest Professional Wrestler of Doom alone! He’s harassing him with all that squealing!
LeRay. Chief Buffalo has taken notice of it and he’s pointing for his partner to come back to the corner. Doom is finally on his way, but he doesn’t appear to be in much of a hurry. Or is he struggling to pull his rather substantial weight onto the apron? He’s asking his partner to help pull him up onto the apron. I can honestly say I’ve never seen that before.
Beeman. Turn around, Chief! Shredsbury is on his feet!
LeRay. Indeed he is and Chesterton fires a dropkick that sends Buffalo colliding into Doom and both men hit the ground. Chesterton dives to his corner and tags Pierre!
|
|
