Destiny 2024 - JWA World Heavyweight Championship

[Kip Whistler]

JWA World Heavyweight Championship Match - One Fall - 60 Minute Time Limit
Arizona Chance (c) vs. Chad Shredsbury

[Chad Shredsbury]

“Good Vibrations” hits and Chad Shredsbury comes out wearing an open Hawaiian shirt that has him surfing a wave over a cartoonish and frightened Arizona Chance. He drops to a knee and throws up the double hang loose while he pops his biceps on the stage.

Beeman. Here he comes, LeRay. The clean sweeping J1 winner.

LeRay. Or the cheater who can’t buy a win against the Franchise.

Beeman. Whatever. Listen to the ladies swoon over the body. In my humble and very heterosexual opinion, this guy has the best body in the business.

LeRay. I hear a chorus of boos, and while I will admit Chad has a remarkable physique, he may want to put a little time into building up his integrity.

Beeman. Spoken like a true loser, LeRay. We’ll see how far your so-called integrity gets Arizona tonight. I have a feeling he’s on the back looking exactly like the caricature on Chad’s shirt right now.

[Thumper Moore III]

Hysteria by Muse begins to play as the arena goes dark. On the Jerkatron, the letters DESTINY appear, and as a single spotlight silhouettes Arizona Chance, the letters fade and then reassemble as FRANCHISE. These letters remain as the arena is bathed in white light as Chance heads to the ring.

LERAY: And here’s the champion! Arizona Chance making his fittest title defense tonight, although he’s been far from inactive. He finished the J-1 at a 3-1-1 record, narrowly missing out on the final against the man he’ll face tonight, Chad Shredsbury.

BEEMAN: Yeah, but in that time, Chad WON the J-1 and compiled a 6-0-0 record in the tournament, including a convincing victory over Red Pirate Rogers.

LERAY: But since then, Chad took a loss to Chance and Rogers in tag action.

BEEMAN: But that was a tag match. Chad hasn’t lost a singles match in over half a year. In my mind, that makes him the favorite.

LERAY: Chance has never lost to Shredsbury, and in my mind, that makes him the favorite. But time will tell, as referee Panther Haberdashery rings the bell and the main event is underway!

[Chad Shredsbury]

LeRay. Shredsbury is pointing to his shirt as he removes it. I’m not sure if he understands that he’s not wrestling a bull. Chance just looking at him as if he expects this kind of childish behavior.

Beeman. Just more mind games from a fantastic psychological wrestler. The depths of Chad’s mind games know no bounds. Even I was fooled into thinking he was a moronic Welsh surfing mimbo for a year and a half.

LeRay. Yes, defrauding the world on your identity is something I’d describe as more of a sociopathic behavior than a mind game, Sean. And here he is now realizing his ploy didn’t work and handing the shirt over to the official.

Beeman. And as soon as Haberdashery turns his back to dispose of it and Chad promptly slaps Chance in the face and slides out of the ring.
LeRay. What a coward!


Beeman. Mind games, anyone?

[Thumper Moore III]

LERAY: Chance looks more bemuse than upset, Sean. He slowly walks over to the side of the ring where Chad stands defiantly on the arena floor and holds open the second and third ropes.

BEEMAN: Don’t fall for it Chad! It’s a trap!

LERAY: Shredsbury pretends to be surfing outside the ring. Chance sighs and leans on a neutral corner as Haberdashery begins the count. At eight, Chad rolls in, then back out. Chance looks more bored than upset. He calls for a mike.

ARIZONA: Hey, BRUH, this is your big opportunity. You want to waste everybody’s time, it’s your prerogative, but I don’t want these fans to witness the worst match in JWA history. So here’s what’s gonna happen: you’re gonna march your pretty little Princess self into the ring after you stop acting like a petulant child, and then I’ll give you the spanking you deserve. BRUH.

LERAY: Chad is fuming and Chance stands at the ready.

[Chad Shredsbury]

LeRay. Talk about a master of mind games, it looks like the shoe is on the other foot now, Sean, as Shredsbury stomps up the ring steps and flares at the Champion from the opposite corner. And he’s off, Chad is charging Chance, who ducks under a clothesline and fires off a number of fists to the midsection of the challenger. Shredsbury is backed into the corner and the champ keeps the punches coming. Chad uses the leverage of the turnbuckle to lean back and push Arizona off with his feet, then rushes the champ again! We’ve gone from zero to a million in the last few seconds here!

Beeman. You certainly have, I can’t even get a word in!

LeRay. Chance catches Shredsbury again and puts him flat on his back with a spine buster! He follows up with an elbow drop but Chad rolls out of the way and comes across the ring with a basement dropkick to the champ’s face!

Beeman. Atta boy, Chad! Look at how he poses for his adoring fans after that move. A selfless act by this great competitor. Have I mentioned how the ladies love him?

LeRay. Maybe once or twice. And as Chad flexes up his patented hang loose Arizona sits back up and wipes his jaw and he is back on his feet as the two grapplers now circle one another. Collar and elbow tie up, and Arizona pulls Chad into a side headlock. Shredsbury fires him off into the ropes and Chance comes back but a leapfrog over head by Shredsbury as Chance comes off the other side and into a Japanese arm drag that takes Chance to the mat. A kip up by Shredsbury and, of course, another pose…

Beeman. Drink it in, people. He’s just getting warmed up, he can do this all day.

[Thumper Moore III]

LERAY: Chance is up much faster than Shredsbury imagined. Arizona spins Chad around mid-pose and starts peppering the challenger with body punches. He whips Chad into the ropes— Chad ducks a Lost Ark Lariat and bounces off the ropes himself— Beautiful Disaster from Shredsbury to Chance!

BEEMAN: Chad must’ve noticed something in the film and he nailed it.

LERAY: Indeed, Chance slow to his feet, using the ropes to pull himself up. Chad launches himself at Chance, who drops and pulls the second rope down as Shredsbury flies to the floor!

BEEMAN: Blatant cheating by the champ.

LERAY: Chance steadies himself and slingshots himself over the top rope and onto Chad with a huge plancha! Chance to his feet and he lets out a primal scream! He grabs Shredsbury— into the railing shoulder first. Arizona— of no, get out of here Sean— he lays Chad on the announce table. Chance rolls back in and climbs to the top— LEGION OF BOOM DROP THROUGH THE TABLE! OH MY GOD! Panther Haberdashery is out here checking on both men— let’s go to replay…

[Chad Shredsbury]

LeRay. The official makes it all the way to a very slow right count as Chance now back on his feet, rolls a limp Shredsbury back into the ring.

Beeman. Chad’s just playing possum. He’s got this in the bag… I hope.

LeRay. That insane spot took a lot out of both me. The Champ covers Chad for one-two-

Beeman. GOD NO!!!

LeRay. And Shredsbury gets his foot on the rope!

Beeman. Never had a doubt. What presence of mind by Chad.

LeRay. Be that as it may, he still finds himself in trouble here. Arizona very deliberately now picks Chad up off the floor and delivers a crisp snap suplex. He picks Chad up again, near the corner now and begins a series of Crystal Skull Bashes into the turnbuckle.

[Chad Shredsbury]

LeRay. The crowd roaring along counting the bashes. Five-six-seven-

Beeman. Why are thy chanting like that? It’s so cruel! Those bashes hurt! And the chants hurt deep down inside!

LeRay. But Chad blocks bash number 8. He fires back an elbow and dips behind Chance delivering a German suplex! He bridges into a pin attempt for a two count!

Beeman. Chad just keeps bringing the fight!

LeRay. Both men back up, slowly again, and a forearm from Chance! A chop from Chad! (Woo!)

Beeman. Oh boy. Back and forth they go, chop for forearm and forearm for chop. And a knee to the face by Chad breaks this up! Chance is backed up, but he kicks Shredsbury right in the gut, doubling him over!

LeRay. Chance whips Chad into the corner and charges in behind him, but Shredsbury jumps up onto the second rope—

Beeman. Most dangerous rope!

LeRay. And Chance hits the turnbuckle with his feet up high and he looks to be caught in a tree of woe!

Beeman. Hahaha! Chad has Arizona exactly where he wants him now, LeRay!

[Thumper Moore III]

LERAY: Shredsbury delivers several kicks to Chance, and he hangs limply from the Tree of Woe. Chad climbs the turnbuckle as Chance grabs the ropes to pull himself up... he’s going to go for a Hang Ten—

BEEMAN: Go for it kid! Make yourself famous!

LERAY: Chad leaps— Chance let’s go of the ropes! Shredsbury to the canvas and he pops up favoring his ankle. Chad charges at the still tied up Chance— Chance pulls himself up and Chad smashes the ring post with his shoulder! Chance uses Chad’s back to steady himself as he unties himself, and he’s back on his feet— he grabs Chad’s head— and delivers skull bashes 8, 9, and 10! Chad is dazed— Lost Ark Lariat!

BEEMAN: NO NO NO!

LERAY: Chance picks up Chad— Modified Michinoku Driver! Chance to the second rope, he’s waiting, waiting… Sedona Sunrise! He covers— one, two, 2.99! Chance is shocked! He thought he had it won! Chance bends over to pick up Shredsbury— small package from Chad! One, two, 2.99! He almost caught the Mastermind by surprise and stole the title! Chance now up and signaling for the Last Crusade…

[Chad Shredsbury]

LeRay. The Champ reaches to pick Chad up, but Shredsbury grapevines the right arm into an arm bar and draws Chance down to the canvas! He’s pulling for all he’s worth and Arizona is feeling it!

Beeman. He’s going to rip his arm off and smash him with it.

LeRay. Highly unlikely as Chance rolls to the right and uses his left arm to deliver a barrage of hammer fists to Chads face. He breaks the hold!

Beeman. No!

LeRay. Chance is back to his feet and he shakes the spin out of that right arm. And in that moment Chad delivers a step up enzugiri to Arizona’s face, spinning the champ around.

Beeman. Chance hits the mat and Shreds locks on a surfboard! Look at the grimace in the face of Chance! Chad is determined to make the Franchise tap out!!!

LeRay. I don’t think that will ever happen… it couldn’t be… Arizona reaching desperately for the ropes and Panther hovers closely…

[Thumper Moore III]

LERAY: Chance reaches the rope and Shredsbury is forced to break the hold! Shredsbury releases immediately, scoops Chance back into the Tree of Woe, climbs the ropes— HANG TEN HITS! Chance may be out! One, two, three!

BEEMAN: YEEEEEEESSSSS!!!!

LERAY: Wait— NO, Panther Haberdashery has pointed to Chance’s foot underneath the rope! By the skin of his teeth, Chance is still alive!

BEEMAN: NOOOOOO!!!

LERAY: Shredsbury picks Chance up and gives the sign— he’s ready to Shred the Gnar— LAST CRUSADE! LAST CRUSADE! One, two, three! Chance retains!

BEEMAN: NO NO NO!!!

LERAY: Wait, hold on— Chance’s hand is not being raised. Let’s go to replay— Sean, both men were on their back with an arm thrown over each other! It’s a double pin! This match ends in a draw! What a finish!

BEEMAN: I’ve got to give it to Chance. He looks good on his back getting pinned. Even if he keeps the title.